Hit Me, I'm Exalted
by Tom
based on Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced by the Dropkick Murphys

I play in a band, we're the best in the land
We're big in both Nexus and Gem
I'll play a white jade sitar, but see mooks at the bar
There's an old thaumaturge there with them
So come on now bullies, girls thinks scars are cool
These dice mods mean nothing to me
Let's finish these drinks and then enjoy the fight
'Cause I'm meaner than half of Yozi

So hit me, I'm Exalted
I'll parry, then knock you 'cross town
with the essence, god kissed me
And I don't fight combat in rounds

I can bench press simhata, I'm a recovered castrata
with degrees from both Realm and Yu-shan
Extras can't keep up, I'm a real war machine
I last longer than old Authochthon
I've designed 5 dot manses, I get THREE second chances
I cook creation's best mosp flambe
I'll take the pick of the lunars, dudes shapechange for me
I don't need perform charms to get laid


I'm a caste of the night, an assassin's delight
Took the Bull of the North by the horns
One more dot of Command and I'll have a full Wing
Come Calibration, we're taking out Thorns
I've a manse on the hill with a red jade framed bed
That puts the Empress's Palace to shame
With a black jade swimming pool and First Age Artifacts
I'm just back from raiding Gethamane

[Chorus x2]

Ahh, forget it. Who am I kidding?

I'm a pitiful sight, and my caste mark's not bright
It's drawn on with glitter alone
I'm a mook and a liar, no exaltation's desire
Won't someone please throw me a bone

But I'll save up my points, and do all I can
Until I have two Essence or more
I'll be a wyld beastman, or a Deathlord's right hand
Then I'll tell all the boys back at home-

[Chorus x1]

[Chorus, refrain:]
So hit me, I'm Exalted
I'll parry, then knock you 'cross town
My Essence pool, "IT'S TINY!"
And I don't fight combat in rounds

[Chorus x2]

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